Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Imagination at work..redefined.. ;-)

I chat all day via email with my batchmates from IITM...
this guy below that i am having a conversation with is one of my best friends...Bhavdeep Singh Virdi by name...I call him surd..booze-buddy..dope-buddy....funda-buddy.."yes-we-will-change-this-world-someday buddy"....he's currently working in chennai for a Company which makes Market Reports sector-wise primarily for the US..which means he walks in at 5:00 PM to start his day and call companies after his secondary research is through...He and his company call it prospecthunting or some such biz-savvy term..I call it Call-center job...Read on...starting from lowest mail for a good laugh...

Note:Stuff in white is what i wrote..while stuff in grey is what surd wrote


Thanks macha...thank you..thank you...glad u liked it...
;-0
Chal..abhi kaam kare de..
k


hahahahaha...... awesome imagination......
kini seriously man....... we should be writing scripts for some ad-agency or for some stupid movie...... not giving ass to F and T .... Kirdi was the best part of the whole story.......its a last sexy name...... looks like kidney..... hehehehe....... V......

There's a continuation to the story ! And ir's something like this..
Mr.Virdee Junior falls head over heals in love with Miss.Kini bcos she is so beeauitful and smart...and he's a dud ! (imple da...it's from the genes in both cases) Ms.Kini's dad knows that he's in control of the situation now...he instructs his daughter to act as though she's in love with Mr.Virdee Junior...she is a true dad's daughter and agrees...since she has been taught the right principles and been told hajaar time"moneys' secondary..relationships are primary !!" Virdee Junior promptly falls for it..just like his dad had....he's a true dad's son...ofcourse... Virdee senior is now old and senile and has Aids cos of his many adventures when he was a student...he wasn't careful...but he was careful abt his money and made a lot of it.he used to save by not putting petrol in his sakootar..he used gobar gas to power it...his own gobar... Now the action hour...Ms.Kini says lets get married..to Virdi Junior..notVirdi Senior..although he would like that since he's that despo..even after IT's stopped working for ages... Virdi junior is acting like a well-trained dog by now and accepts whatver Ms.Kini says as Godspeak ! He says "dad..agar tumney shaadi nahi karvayi..toh I'll walk out of the house !! And let u die alll alone !!" Virdee Senior has now realised his folly..he has now realised that "moneys' secondary..relationships are primary !!" ...but alas...too late.. He meets Mr.Kini and begs in front of him...but Mr.Kini wants his revenge...for not helping him enuf to get the girl he liked during their summers@iitm inspite Of doing so much for mr.Virdee... Mr.Virdee goes back..and accepts his fate...he gives his blessings for the marriage since he doesn't want to die all alone and uncared for...(Mrs.Virdee has at the moment gone to "caneda" on a shopping trip..she will not be coming back until she's done...her alimony pays for that !) The marriage ceremony is over...Sharukh Khans Son is the star dancer ! He's been gracious enuf to come bcos mr.Kini was ex-Prime Minister of India before giving up all his money and dedicating his life to the service of (wo- ?? )mankind... Miss.Kini no longer exists ...she's now Mrs.Virdi junior..she thinks the Virdi surname sucks..she gets it changed to Mrs.Kirdi..everything with a K is so much cooler...although not a "kini" anymore we are close she says... But it's just not the same..so she decides to divorce Mr.Kirdi Junior...bcos the name sucks... Mr.Kirdi senior is incensed !(btw,even Mr.Kirdi had to change his name...Mr.Kini wanted to humiliate him and laid that as a condition to the marriage) He;s had enuf...but what to do...no use... Anhoni ko koi taal sakta hai bhala... Mrs.Kirdi becomes Ms.kini again..and gets almost everythign except $ 5 as Alimony from Mr.Kirdi.. Mr.Kini is living in aish with ash...aishwarys daughter of course... Mr.Kirdi junior after being dumped by his ex-wife has no aatma-samman or focus..he picks up the next thing in a skirt at the local tharra-bar(he has only 5$ remember !) Mr.Kirdi senior is cured...he never had AIDs...when IT never did work,how the hell could he have got AIdS ever ! It was just a bad case of indigestion...even the pakis smelt it !! And he's stuck with a stupid name...Mr.Kirdi...

How was this for a perfect story ???saala mather jaat insaan !! Kini se panga ?? Regards k


i pray da........ ok dont say like i never pray sala mere ko tension hoti hai........
oh by the way you might not have much savings ever in your life........ u will have a daughter and i will have son..... i will have billions and u will have nothing..... then your daughter and my son.... inky pinky ponky..... then i will ask your daughter what does your dad do?? she will say he was in IIT madras and now doesnt have any job.... all he does is booze and dope and sleep and beat up Mrs Kini and life is bad and is like hell..... Mrs Kini dooshroon ke gharoon mein bartan saaf karti hai.... I will ask which batch IIT?? is he from MBA 2004?? she will just nod her head and meri aankhoon se do boond aansoo tapak jayenge..... and then we will meet after 30 years.... and tu mere ehsaanon ke neeche dab jayega....... he ha ha he ha ha ........ ghalib said " dil ko khush rakhne ko ghalib yeh khayal aacha hai"
;-)
V........

Abey...ho jaayega yaar...no probs...once u start earning a lot after a few promotios and all that..apne aap ho jaata hai..i don't want to load myself rite now... Dekh yaar...do we have extravagant tastes..thodi si daarooo maar lete hai..thoda sa cigarette...buy a fe wclothes(havent done that for some
time) and thoda sa baahar kha lete hain...thats normal for anybody our age... Haan..once we r like 30 typs...get married...have kids..tab load aa hi jaayega...and we'll have to save and then wahtever u do save alos doesn't seem enuf...u r going to be unhappy whatever the case...so whats the point of not enjoying atleast now ! And atleast pray ok...find out from ur mom/dad which is a good poem types(shlok types) from the Guru Granth sahib and just mutter it whenever free...man ko shaanti deti hi..tension khallas ! Have been doing it for 4-5 years now..mite work for u too.. Bugger morde called...as usual...insurance yeh..insurance who..shouted at him..told him "if u have nothing to talk abt urself and ur life...dont call !!"..bugger said sorry da and all...poor chap..is all alone in that sick place !wants to shift desperately to pune/mumbai... Have forwarded his CV in orange fro sales/mktg...inshallah he gets a call.. k


what??? your kids will have chumma fun on dad's money???
where is the money?? show me the money-show me the money (from Jerry
Magwire)
our kids will beg on streets if we dont start saving from today..... we should save man... or else.... we are history....... and i pray sometimes..... hey N used to carry her books?? oh no....... gandu kismat man........ ekdum kharab kismat...... V........

Baaastard ! Senior junta used to say..man this guy used to talk so much and lead all events and have huge plans in 1st year...after the girlfirend funda came in..he used to audit HR courses !! Just bcos she was crediting them and wanted him to carry her books !!Shit..anyways...everything for their own good... Saaley.,.goto gurudwara da ! Sunday ke Sunday ja na ! Or some other day..u have mornings off anwyways na...go and come back by afternoon... Not that I shld say anythign..i havent gone to a temple for ages... But shit...I say the gayatri mantra atleast on the train when the phone radio doesn't work(bcos of the interference ) for something like 10 times !! Our parents were good macha...they made us decent ppl...wonder how we will ever be able to do it ! Atleast we r thinkign of this kinda stuf...our kids will be absoulute brats ! I am sure ! No focus..no enthu..chumma...live on dad's money and chill.. Uff... k


sad life da macha...... shit man i havent gone to gurudwara since long long time........ i need to talk to Him...... V.............

Ok...saaley know more abt ur own religion da...it's gives some stability in life...matlab "jadh"..foundation ...theek hai ??? Bastard...go to gurudwara regularly and pray for the world to be a peaceful place ! Not that u get 50k/month !! ;-0 No macha...religion is importan..no bjp-hindutva types...but in our own small way... As I see it...u have something/somebody to thank/curse when things go according to plan/get f#$@ed up !! That's the purpose of GOD ! Chal chod...funde some other day...k

well, nirankari are someother sect da....... akali is me........ and akali dal is a party....... and parkash singh badal is the head of the party......... ok got some fundas?? i hav very less fundas of my own religion....... whenevery i beak some fundas, i come to know this is not done in Sikhism.......V.......

U gyuys have jaat fundas too ?? I thot surds didn't ! Then whats akali,nirankari,etc..Just for info da... Macha...a jwas ok..da...ashwin the bastard used to hype her up macha !! Chumma chumma wil say.."macha her lips were like rose petals macha...too much !"... Bnugger has seen to many pondy's in engg ! ;-0 same with that babe da.... Me and gautham used to say..what fa duck..whats there to like inm her ?? He was like..what a style macha....she's at a different level macha... Dhut ! Bakwaas karta tha saala ! ;-0 Uf... k

hey i dont know my jaat fundas da......
its like my mom's comes from a family of farmers (so JAT) and my dad comes from a family of workmen (so Tarkhan) dont ask about it i wont be able to give you any info.... and that a j got married na?? oh before i forget, i have mostly good food for 10 bucks in office in the night..... something like sambar rice + curd rice + appalam + 2 kinds of sabzi + chapati..... and i say this again, all this for JUST 10 (TEN) Rupees...... hahahahahaha......... sala c#$%iya....... jal mat jal mat......
:-)
V........

Saala..u r the third person today who'lll be cursed by a brahmin ! First 2 were kelya and ronnie for reminding me of a j and her affair ! Tereko bhi jannat mein hasinaayen nahi milengi !!! Sangeetha food !! Kya nainsaafi hai !! nice south indian brahmin boy gets thrown to mumbai and misses out on sambar rice and pickle...has to eat chappati and chole and some shit... While decent looking surd (what jaat do u belong to bey ?ok..no jaat fundas in sikhism ! I know...) gets to live in madras and eat sambhar rice and picle and 3 types of sabzi...all for 25 bucks !! And check out the babes for free ! Some people are lucky I guess... ;-0 k


well then arun lal sucks........ not me........ i was just transfering information....... he was like "patan from Lahore bowling to the little master from Mumbai...... "
well if sandhya cooks food in the afternoon, she will cook so much that she doesnt have to cook in the evening...... she is smart man...... tamil na..... most of it is either wasted or dipu and dhiman have to heat it again and eat in the evening...... and if i eat in sangeeta i can have what ever i like..... and 25 rupees sexy rice and sambar and curd and some 3 types of vegetables and what not....... and check out the babes...... forget about my food da...... i can also eat at my cousin's place...... no problemo.......
and i say this again arun lal sucks...... what bakwas he and amir sohail were doing..... manjerekar and ravi shashtri were good.....
V........

It took u so long to say it !! That in itelf shows how confused u were ! Hehehhe And afridi is not from lahore! He's from baluchistan ! Saala pata nahi hai toh phek mat! k

yes she has......... hahahahaha.......... oops she too is ur bhen.......anyways........ just wanted to let u know, it was awesome when sachin made his 10000 runs........ every pakistani came and handshaked...... that little fellow wicket keeper.... kamran akmal removed his keeping gloves, inner gloves and hand shaked with two hands........ he was like " MERA BHAGWAN MERA BHAGWAN" seriously man..... awesome respect they gave...... for a change the harami pathan from lahore "AFRIDI" also looked humble...... V.........


Ok...granted ...u won round 2...but this is a battle macha..u have won the battle...i'll win the WAR !! Does P have a til on her forearm ??? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha !!! Lemme see u answer that question !!! GOT U DIDN'T I ?? Saala surd ko confuse kar diya ! k

hey there is this sexy babe sitting next to me........
she also has a TIL on here arm....... she is ur sister.......errrrr i dont want to say....... maane dukh laage.... hahahahahahaha........ surd hits back and hits under the belt....... i win u lose...... V........

Macha..that was too much !! Both of us sent the mail at the same time asking what's happening !! Macha...this freaked me out da !!! Too much ! Saaala ..kumbh mela..bichddey huey bhai fundas are there da,...definitely.. U have a til on ur left forearm ?? No ?? I do...soryy..worng connection... Hey that beggar in the station doesn't have a til on his left forearm ! Maybe he's ur brother !! hehehehehehe k

abe chilly chicken.....
kya kaar raha hai be??
kuch kaam kar le and mere ko bhi kuch kaam karne de...... V......


And so I have a nice day..even at work !!!
;-)
ritz

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